So I just realized that it posted the date at the top of every post so I fortunately no longer have to keep writing it. Hooray! To set the scene, right now I am sitting outside, surrounded by mountains, trying to soak up some sun while debating whether anyone will notice if I devour the last half of the box filled with blueberry scones. Soooo tempting. But I shall resist so I might regale you with our day’s adventures.
Horseback Riding
This morning we woke up quite early, donned our riding gear (which in my case, being the avid horsewoman that I am, consisted of a pair of jeans and sneakers) and headed to the livery. Thirteen family members were present, so we basically dominated the riding group that set out, thus beginning the Great Horseback Adventure.
We were assigned certain horses based on our size and past riding experience (which for me was a grand total of two times), and I was greeted by a skewbald horse by the name of Trooper. Now Trooper and I are like BFFs. He totally agreed with me on the fact that walking in a straight, single file line was boring and so instead spent the majority of the trip trying to sneak a taste of the yummy shrubberies. However, since we basically we of the same mind, I caught onto his little tricks and so, for the most part, I was able to thwart his advances.
I really think that the horses tended to match the personalities of their riders. For instance, Trooper and I would both much rather be eating than hiking aimlessly along a trail. John Alex’s horse Pete, being the horse in front of us, spent the duration of the trip leaving delightful steaming packages, ever so thoughtfully, right in front of us. He even thought to perfume the air for us, with his oh so wonderful inner body smell. Lovely.
However, the trip itself was a ton of fun. We ended up riding for about two and a half hours throughout the Rocky Mountain National Park. The views were fantastic and you got to ride magnificent beasts while you’re at it. While I still wouldn’t describe myself as a horse fanatic by any means (this would entail me actually having feelings), I have decided that I would love to take up jousting. They unfortunately don’t allow the man on man jousting anymore, but they still do have the jousting where you try and hit a hanging wooden circle of two inches in diameter with a 6 foot long lance while riding at full speed.
And no, I didn’t get to try it today. But I did get to talk to my Uncle Jack about it, who has been riding horses for 75 years and was named California’s Horseman of the Year in the 70s. He was some pretty hot stuff. Like red, hot chili pepper hot. So I picked his brain about his new possibility of mine. But all in all, loved the experience :)
Mini-Golf aka Mini-Hockey
After lunch and a brief catnap in the sun, six of us hit up the mini-golf range here at our campground/lodge thingy. What started off as a very serious game with tightly regulated rules, morphed into an equally serious game of competitive golf-hockey. We couldn’t quite figure out if we were playing with each other or against, since people were simultaneously kicking balls off the course, while setting up paths of clubs leading straight to the hole, making it impossible for others to miss.
The rules basically morphed into this:
1. If you don’t make a hole in one, others reserve the right to steal your ball and play it for you.
2. If the ball doesn’t stop moving, then it still counts as one hit, regardless of how many times a club touches it.
3. On random holes, we would all have to switch to playing left-handed, much to uneasiness of the other players at the course.
And my personal favorite:
4. If the course obstacle at that hole was stupid, kicking the ball was not only allowed but highly encouraged.
But a lot of fun, bonding with the relatives.
Movietime and the Great Key Adventure
After skipping the 8 of the last 9 holes at the putt putt range, the group took off to our central meeting place where we watched Steve Huyler’s new award-winning documentary that he made about this woman’s art in India. Uncle Jack also gave everyone copies of his book and CD that he made of folk songs he sang while growing up.
Look at the pins we got! "Blood is thicker than cement"
We had a brief break before the giant family ordeal of the family panoramic, so Dad and I decided to head back to the room. Unfortunately, when we got there, neither of our keys worked. Bear in mind that these are real keys and not flimsy plastic cards. But the keys would only go in halfway. This was really bizarre because they were working perfectly well just hours prior.
Now, as many of you know, I have issues with keys and opening locked doors. However, after becoming a recent fan of the new TV show Covert Affairs, I decided to release my inner secret agent and try my hand, once again, at lock picking. And guess what? I DID IT! I successfully managed to open a locked door with only a credit card!!! Gah, I felt like such a secret agent. This feeling was soon lost when people pointed out that real secret agents didn’t ecstatically shout their success at picking locks to the entire building.
But we made it into the room, and funnily enough, the lock fixed itself soon after. Weird.
Portraits and Porter Follies
At 5:30, the family began assembling to take our traditional panoramic photo, taken by my Uncle Ben, the photographer. Gee, isn’t it handy to have at least one of those in the family?
Now this is always a long complex affair, though luckily, this year, Dad opted to keep his shirt on for the majority of the photos. I snapped a quick shot of the entire assembled family (present here at the reunion). I believe the last count was that we had 77 people here out of the possible 110 that are still living. But you can count the peeps in the picture to verify:
Click to see full size image
After the picture, I sprinted across the camp to grab my computer just in time to check in for our Southwest flight tomorrow. It wasn’t that far, but I sure was huffing and puffing when I got there. I blame the altitude and the resulting lack of oxygen. The fact that I haven’t exercised all summer had nothing to do with it, I assure you. In fact, the altitude became a great fall back excuse for anything, be it having difficulty hiking, forgetting the lyrics to the family folk songs, or losing horribly in putt-putt. ♪Blame it on the a-a-a-a-altitude ♪
The evening was spent hosting our first Porter Family Follies. Generally each reunion we do a sort of a talent show, but this year it was fairly more organized. It was great. We had people doing cheers, telling funny stories, singing songs they wrote, the whole lot. Unfortunately, my side of the family seemed to miss out of the musical gene that seemed to grace every other family member at the reunion, and we were forced to watch and bemoan our lack of any performable talents. What could I do? Give everyone a tour of Carolina?
But it was a great conclusion to our family reunion. Tomorrow we’ll have one last get together before everyone goes their separate ways. It was great getting to see and talk to everyone, and learn new things. Like what to do when a bear chases you and other useful things like that. (The answer, my friends, is to dial zero).
But that’s all for tonight, folks. Peace out.
1 Response to Blame it on the Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Altitude
Good way-toofreaking-early in the morning!
Fuuniest parts of the above for me: that your horse agreed with you on hiking; Patrick's horse pooping (hmmm, if people and their horses resemble each other, what does that say about Patrick, nevermind, not sure if I wanna know), and you living out your superspy fantasy after, ahem, ahem, another key adventure...
By the way, awesome picture with your dad. Very sweet.
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